Monday, September 17, 2007

The Joy of Fantasy Dinners

Note: This is one of my classics, which I originally posted in November 2005. Some of my favorite readers have already seen it and commented. Do it again. It's a fantasy so I guess it's okay to post it again. Hoss and Scarlett made me do it this time. See how twisted my arm is?

When…when…I can afford to host an expensive Fantasy Dinner, these are the people I want to invite.

  • Paul Himes Nichols and Wilbur Shaw, my two grandfathers who died before I was born.
  • Paul Thomas Nichols, my oldest brother, who also died before I was born. ("Hello. I'm Paul and this is my brother, Paul.")
  • Rahab of Jericho, history's most famous hooker, who is listed in the Bible's "Hall of Faith."
  • David, the King of Israel. He lived about a thousand years before his great-something grandson, Jesus Christ. (David is the great-grandson of Rahab, by the way.)
  • The first and the last Mayan Chiefs
  • Quanah Parker and his mother, Cynthia Ann Parker
  • Any American Pioneer Family that crossed the prairies
  • Victor Borge
  • Mother Teresa
  • Chief Joseph
  • Albert Einstein and Muhammad Ali

My Keynote Speaker is Joseph, the first person in the Bible who was called a Hebrew.

The menu will include caviar, roasted lamb, and chocolate—lots of chocolate. Baked Alaska for dessert. But that's not all, of course.

Dinner Music by Andrew Lloyd Webber. Or Wolfgang Mozart. Or The Second Chapter of Acts. Wait a minute…what about ABBA? Yes, ABBA! Or there's the Academy of St. Martin's in the Field…

Entertainment: Riverdance? Hmmm, maybe the Alvin Ailey Dancers? Would The Muppets be a good act for such sophisticated people? I'm open to great Sarah Brightman.

Caterer: Jamie Dawn (She asked first; I'm sure she'll be hiring soon.)

Decisions. Decisions. Decisions.
I can't even get my fantasies straight. The Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir? Veggie Tales?

Now if I can just fantasize up enough money to pay for this...

If anyone wonders why Jesus isn't listed, it's because when I sit down to dinner with Him, it won't be no fantasy.